Thursday, May 31, 2012

Love Their Dad

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One of the best things you can do for your stepkids is to show kindness and love to their dad. They have likely seen a lot of negativity between their own parents through divorce or a breakup. Modeling for them a loving and kind relationship will do wonders for their future ability to enjoy and be a part of loving and kind relationships in their own lives.

One of the first things they will be watching for is the way you treat their father. They anticipate that they way you treat their dad is the way you'll treat them too. If you are loving and kind to dad, you have a much better chance of building a great relationship with them.

How do you show your step kids that you love their dad? How has it affected them to see their dad's new relationship?

This Is Your Community

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This is a blog dedicated to community. We hope to share many stepmom's inspirations, quick tips, words of wisdom and lessons learned. It's in the sharing that we are inspired and learn. Check out the links to We Want To Hear Your Story and Ask A Question to get involved and start interacting with other inspired stepmoms.

You should know that you are free to be anonymous. Some stepmoms are in situations where things are very amicable and other stepmoms have come into situations that can be very contentious. Stepmotherhood is a challenge and we should all enjoy a bit of privacy in our journeys. We are happy to offer you as much anonimity as you wish. Just let us know.

So please contribute your ideas and wisdom to the community. We'd love to hear from you. 

Building Strength, Courage, Patience and Love

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The goal of Inspired Stepmoms is to support each other in building strength, courage, patience and love without our own hearts. As we master that in ourselves we are better able to share those attributes in our families and with our spouse. These four components seem critical for step mom success.

Strength -- It takes a lot of energy to be a step mom. Staying strong emotionally, mentally and physically will make the days feel easier and your burdens feel lighter.

Courage -- It takes a lot of courage to believe that your little family will make it against sometimes discouraging odds. Bringing a new parent into a family or two families together is not easy. Having faith and hope that you will succeed brings more happiness and gratitude to life.

Patience -- Fitting into an already established father and child relationship can be tricky. As can adjusting to previously established habits and living styles. Patience helps you to get through the frustrating stuff and focus on the love and traditions you are enjoying building in this new family.

Love -- When you choose to act in love, you are able to more clearly define your purpose and course of action outside of emotional distractions. Love will also bring a spirit of healing to the home and encourage the establishment of a warm and caring environment.

How have these components brought success to your family? Is there one you are particularly focusing on right now? Please share in the comments below.

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Welcome To Inspired Stepmoms

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Welcome to Inspired Stepmoms, the blog. This is a community I have been wanting to create for several years now. I am so happy that this day has arrived and hope you'll join in this community of stepmoms and lend your support to other women who desire to be Inspired Stepmoms.

I am a stepmom. It's been the greatest blessing of my life and also the greatest challenge and at times greatest stress of my life. I share in the raising of a fantastic little one who has blessed my life with more love, hugs, kisses, songs and smiles than I could have ever imagined. When she says, "I love you mother. Now you say "I love you daughter" to me, it melts me. I have learned a lot over the past few years, sometimes those lessons have come blissfully and some days I've had to step back and say, "Boy, I didn't do that so well. How can I do better" and then do some soul searching.

Being a stepmother can be a very difficult experience, no matter how hopeful you are going into it. Legal, financial, geographical and workplace issues all create stress on the situation. Each person in the new, more complicated family situation also brings their own baggage to it: fears, past experiences, expectations, disappointments, etc. which also complicate things and cloud our and other's judgment at times.

I have experienced in my life that I learn the best and most frequently when I am talking with friends. They always seem to say something that inspires and in the course of the conversation ideas come to my mind that will solve problems and improve situations. I hope this site will be a place of communion for the stepmom sisterhood. I hope it will be a place where many inspired relationships are build and that there are many families who will be blessed by good things shared here.

Again, welcome to Inspired Stepmoms. Looking forward to connecting! Introduce yourself in the comments below or say hello anonymously. Tell us how you found your feet as a stepmom.